8 months since I broke my foot

My friends and family must be watching me because I hear them say, "your getting around good today" or "oh, your limping".

The truth is, even when I am not limping, I still feel pain in my foot. Sometimes less than others but its not gone. This is the point at which patience becomes a true challenge.   I am now fully realising how much muscle atrophy I truly have. Emotionally I have had secret pity parties about dancing, jumping, and general life. I spend more time off my foot than I would ever care to admit. According to my doctor all systems go, Houston we have lift off, and I am free to go back to my normal life. There is some sort of disconnect between what doc says I can do and reality. Reality is: my one year recovery is only 7 months out because I have to count from my surgery date. Recovery is a process, its long and not for the impatient. 

I have come along ways but theres still further to go. 

Perhaps in a year from now I will be active again. I am thinking hiking, dancing, ice skating, not feeling scared to join friends in what ever their activity might be.

Ditching the boot

Well... its been 18 days since my screw removal. I am not supposed to ditch the boot till tuesday but I am so sick of the thing. I unwrapped my foot, the skin has that funny look but the bruises are almost gone.  It still gets purple but overall I think its healing great.  My activity level is still somewhat sedentary but managing that along with pain is still an art form to me. I make it through the day without painpills but if i want any sleep at night i still have to take them.

This injury is so incredibly long term and when I lose heart my mom reminds me of my mantra; the goal is to heal well now so i can function the rest of my life.

Here is the foot photo of the day.

Surgery 2

So I  go to my 1 week post op later today.  I had hardware removal.

Recovery this time is so much better.  Its unclear to me which or all of the following made it easier; I knew what to expect, the surgery was less invasive, my body doesnt like metal in it, or perhaps my attitude and health are better.

How has this injury changed you?

I try to describe to well intended friends and family that this has changed my life. But, how can you describe those changes without sounding like a complainer.  I dont really feel like telling everyone I know all the ways in which this has changed me and why. Frankly I dont think most people have a true understanding of what it means to have their whole life come to a complete stop and when it slowly begins its momentum that the process is long.

I dont feel like telling people yeah I know that injury was 6 months ago but I have high pain days still.  I still feel uncertain about how long my foot will last. I still can't traverse uneven ground very well. I often fear falling and thats just the begining of my emotions on this topic.

Tonight I had to let one of my best friends down. She needs me and i am not going to be there for her.

'How has this injury changed you?'  There just isn't an accurate way to describe it.

2am

Well.... the pain isnt crippling like just after surgery but I would love to be pain free.  I am doing really great and I think the physical therapist might have released me today but i still limp.  Its 2am in the morning and I cant sleep. My foot is aching, my whole dam leg is aching. I  took some pain meds so I can get some sleep. I want to be done with the therapist, sick of hurting after.

Lol, is it still a midnight rant if its 2am?

I wish I was sleeping. .....

Crutch free

I forgot to post (good sign right?). 

On November 19th at therapy I was made to walk crutch free. That night I had a bought of determination and decided that I wanted to remain crutch free so begining November 20th I am oficially crutch free with one exception. My exception is the swimming pool, its slippery so I use my knee walker and have my sister help/spot me. I use the boot at night when my foot is tired but mostly I am device free. Seams like its taken forever and I still experience pain and swelling but my hobble is slowly looking like a walk.

I so miss driving that I am thinking of sneaking out to the car and seeing what it feels like. I am unsure how the movement will be so just going down the road and back. Nothing major as I am still legally liable until the doctor clears me, but I see him later this week :-) 

Dreaming of embracing my new freedom with christmas lights and hot chocolate, maybe even some shopping.

One Crutch

I am recovering slowly but successfully.   I havent posted in a while because I am doing well.  Although,  it seemed an update might be in order.

Last Friday I went swimming for the first time and this week began alternating swimming and physical therapy. In the pool I walk small laps in the shallow end then swim when my foot is tired, for approximately 30 to 45 minutes.

Therapy sessions now include a variety of the following:  antigravity treadmill,  seated stepper with rounded half balls put on the foot plates, balance board, an isometric machine, manual stimulation, and e-stem.  After an hour or more of this I am quite fatigued.

I  am not progressing fast but I can tell soon I will be walking without the crutch. I have quit my boot also, just a few days ago. I am thinking i will try to use the boot and no crutches .... play with what works.

I believe today is 14 weeks post surgery.

I have been wanting to do fun winter things like go ice skating.  My son is sweet and told me he would go ice skating with me. My thought is that this is a good sign. State of mind is deffinately part of a long recovery.

Feeling foot successful

Had a great day of therapy today!  Worked on the aero G, or the antigravity treadmill for 5 min at 68%weight then 10 min at 70%weight.  The seated step machine with round pads under my feet for maybe 4 to 6 min which really worked my calf, ankle, and foot on my broken foot side.

These times and amounts seem so small and it seems forever having gotten to this point but I am progressing and its exciting.  I cant wait to drive again! 

I am hoping to keep up my good work and walk solely with one crutch.  Pain has finally subsided and I enjoyed muscle fatigue in my right calf and foot.  I never thought I would be happy about muscle fatigue,  guess its all in what you have to compare too.

Antigravity treadmill

Todays therapy session included estem, theraputic massage, and the antigravity treadmill for 10 min.  I walked (with support for 60% of my weight) for the first time with both feet since July 24th. 

E stem

I missed the name, its called E-stem.

The electrical stimulation.

10 weeks post surgery

Weekly seems like a nice amount of posting.  I realize that a left foot injured person is more likely getting out more than me. I cant wait to drive... but carrying stuff is an issue and now that I have gotten used to the scooter and basket the thought of the next big change is both scary and exciting.

I started physical therapy on Tuesday.  I will see Aaron 3 days a week for a while. The massage and electric therepy were pretty great.  I talked alot because I was nervous.

9 weeks post surgery

I keep being asked how its going.  Well, I am still NWB till next week. I still try to do things using my knee scooter. Not sure how much up time I get before the foot looks this purple blue color. The good news is I elevate it and the color gets happy again.  Usually thats the only symptom but sometimes some asleep sortof tingles or swelling comes on too. I have also experienced some odd temperature changes in the foot. It will be cold or hot for no apparent reason. If I notice any reasons I will happily input that. Pain is usually low, not gone but enough for me to easily push forward in somewhat daily life.  My lifestyle wasn't particularly zealously active but I cant wait to get my freedom back. I been trying to figure out how I might get in and out of the pool if I get someone to drive me.....

Sadly I am adjusting to my new lifestyle and I am not sure thats such a good thing.

83 days post injury

64 days post surgery

Aka 9 weeks post surgery

8 weeks post surgery

I am so delighted... this blog might actually help someone besides me. Thank you so much for posting!

I am posting this photo of my new best friend (thank god its not forever) the knee scooter with basket.

My doctors appointment was Tuesday and he said I need to get moving again.  I have alot of muscle atrophy from non use.   However, my NWB has helped significantly so he wants 2 more weeks of that then we will start the PT.  I thought I was going to get in trouble admitting that I wasnt wearing the aircast 24/7 because its heavy.  He added in ABC excersizes.  To me it seems like the perfect compromise to, as he calls it, wake my foot up.  I was fearful about getting back on my foot and this pace is helping me with both mental and physical hurdles. Today I did random sets of drawing ABC with my foot/toes while lounging in front of the tv.  Its amazing how different my foot is now. 

Often I am grateful that I wasnt misdiagnosed by the podiatrist following my case.  That I didnt walk on it after the initial diagnoses of one fractured metatarsal from the ER, because it was really 5 fractures and 2 dislocations. I am so incredibly thankful that I have friends and family that love and care about me.  When I have times of dispare I tell myself how lucky I am not to be worried about getting the rent paid or feeding the kids. It all could have been so much worse and for some it has been. So, many times I find appreciation for my life. If this had to happen... at least it was in a time of good support onmultiple levels.

If your challenged by this serious injury your in my thoughts and if I could help you I would.  Lol, but if not we could have scooter races...

7 weeks post surgery

7 weeks post sugery, 9 and a half weeks post injury.

Sounds like small numbers right... its a long time when you cant put weight on your foot. In preperation for finding my way back to weight bearing, I have been spending more time up and about.  I still have week energy but with my handy knee walker and some help, I can still pretend I am a force to be reckoned with.

I got to put my foot in the shower today, first time in 7 weeks. Sounds gross, doesnt look to nice either, but I will be able to walk on it eventually so I just keep thinking big picture. Heal it now and use it the rest of my life.

I have attached some pre and post shower photos... dreaming of when my foot is pretty again.

Reminder that it gets better

Below is someone else's experience from the lisfranc club on fb.  I just needed to keep this for myself... i am not even 7 werks post surgery but I battle feeling defeated by yhd inability to do things. Still need withdraw from my college classes... checking out from my life has been emotionally harder than i could give credit.

'10 weeks post op - still fatigue, swelling and soreness. 5 months post op - walked all over Charleston, including up and down steps on aircraft carrier and cobblestone while carrying a 20lb baby:) It does get better!'

More reasons to feel loved

I keep intermittently getting gifts in some form or another from those that love me.  I never could have guessed at how much they lift me. Today I recieved a present in the mail loaded with stuff I like.  It made me realize that its so nice to be cared about. Friends and family have made time for me, taken me places, and done things for me.  Each one on its own is generous and nice... but together... well when I think of how much I am loved it overwhelms me and the tears spring to my eyes.

Thank you doesnt begin to cover it!

64 days post injury

Yes, things are now marked in days, weeks, doctor appointments and anything major involving 'the foot'.

Its been 64 days since I broke my foot. 45 days since I had surgery. 3 days since the k wires have been removed.

At the last appointment the k wires were taken out and I couldn't bend my foot to a 90 degree angle aka flat, so it's 2 more weeks of non weightbearing. My calf on 'the foot' side has lost a lot of muscle.  While I had read this in other people's experiences I didnt know how to combat the problem. I have done various leg lift excersizes but those dont really work the calf.  Physical therapy will start once I can get my foot flat.  My doctor made me this handy lil wedge that i can remove layers every 4 days to work towards getting my foot flat. So, its really slow but it is progress.

Trying to keep my spirits up. Family and friends have been great about social calls in various forms. I am more grateful to them than they will ever know.

Pins out today

Having the pins pulled out is an intetesting experience.  Its not exactly painful in the traditional sense... but it is painful. (Disregard that date, its a borrowed package to carry the k-wires home in)

As usual I amappreciative of having a good doctor who is patient and kind. He took several breaks for me. Taking them out at my speed.

Feeling better...

I guess the no news is good news philosophy applies. I have been weaning myself off the pain meds. My foot hurts but a bearable amount. I now just mostly hangout, tryimg to be productive on some level. Right now its paperwork and tunes with my bed being the new desk.

50 days non weight bearing

Its been 50 days since my injury.  50 days of NWB (non weight bearing).  50 days since I drove a car, went grocery shopping (thank god for family), or freely did what I wanted with out a babysitter of sorts lol.

Its been 31 days since my surgery.  31 days of various foot wrappings to cover the k-wires in my foot.  31 days to think...  nothing but think for endless hours and endless days.

13 days till my kwires, or pins, or metal things in my foot... what ever you want to call it, they come out.  13 days till i begin that arduous task of relearning to walk on my right foot again.